The only thing I take seriously is my Freedom. And Bacon.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

More Funny Flathead Beacon Police Reports! #5

More funny (yes, these are real) police reports from Flathead Valley Montana:


11:54 p.m. A woman called from Whitefish Stage to report that while her jammie-wearing, intoxicated boyfriend was taking the dog for a walk, the neighbors shot at him with a pellet gun. The neighbors, described as an elderly man and a “manly” looking woman, claimed they shot an air gun into the air in an attempt to get the dog to stop barking at deer.


11:11 p.m. A woman on First Avenue West thought that people at the mall were spying on her with binoculars. 


10:35 a.m. A man on Third Avenue East reported finding a gloomy, sad poem on his door.

6:39 p.m. Someone called from a Kalispell gas station to report that kids were in the store a "hootin' and a hollerin'," making the cashier nervous. The cashier reported that she was not nervous.

7:30 p.m. A woman on Fifth Avenue West reported that a drunken man was bumbling around in her back yard. 


3:39 p.m. A woman on Highway 209 near Bigfork reported seeing a man wearing a Jason mask scurry across the road. She claimed that he pointed and stared at her for a moment then disappeared into a Christmas tree. She last saw him walking with a limp toward Ferndale.

8:10 p.m. A man called in to talk about some bad vibes he was getting from two guys in a gas station on Highway 93 South.

8:18 p.m. A man on Sixth Avenue East reported that a drunken man was in his neighbor's backyard howling "like a goofball." The drunk and his bicycle were taken home.


7:54 a.m. Three baby cows and three adult cows wandered into a Douglas Drive resident’s front yard for a snack. They were taken home.

3:17 p.m. Someone saw a man wearing a green sleeping bag run down Woodland Avenue.

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