The only thing I take seriously is my Freedom. And Bacon.

Wednesday, May 4, 2016

Lindy West - Shrill Feminist Living In Hypocrite City

Lindy West is one confused and unhappy "WOEman."
Here is a review of her book: SHRILL.

Lindy West is a Seattle-based writer, editor, and performer whose work focuses on pop culture, social justice, humor, and body image. She's currently a culture writer for GQ magazine and and a weekly columnist at The Guardian, as well as the founder and editor of I Believe You | It's Not Your Fault, an advice blog for teens. In 2015 she wrote and recorded a story for This American Life about confronting an Internet troll who impersonated her dead father. She also was listed as "Internet's Most Fascinating of 2015" by, and helped launch the viral #ShoutYourAbortion hashtag in defense of women's reproductive rights.

“Three aspects of the self betrayer's conduct always go together: accusing others, excusing oneself, and displaying oneself as a victim.”

Oh Lindy Lindy Lindy.
This book is so...sad.
Lindy admits she was raised in a wealthy home with a progressive mother. I can somewhat identify, though my family didn't talk politics, my mom was a product of the feminist movement.
However, like Lindy, my mom was torn between two worlds.
Wanting to be loved and hold on to traditions of romance - and yet wanting to be independent.
I also, in a way, am like Lindy in that I was highly influenced by pop culture. I thought "progress" meant sexual freedom and gratification and putting pleasure on the top of the "To Do" List.
As I grew older, I realized that not only is pleasure fleeting, it's disabling and dis-empowering. It corrupts our spirit and soul - which then leads to what Lindy is experiencing: a very troubled angry person who lashes out and throws everyone under the bus (with the pretense that "it's for their own good").
Don't get me wrong - what is the point of being an author if not being authentic. I 100% believe that it's great to name names and shame people who have mistreated people.
HOWEVER, the theme in Lindy's book is ANTI-SHAMING people! She feels she's been bullied, but then turns around and does the exact thing she claims to be a victim of.
This book is not funny.
It's not empowering.
LIndy claims to be self-confident; her writing speaks to something different: she has no confidence and so she clings to a movement that does nothing but confuse and divide its members.
Of note on being part of the Twitter panel that "seeks to provide a safe place from bullying."
I read Shrill just as Azealia Banks went on a Twitter rampage against Sarah Palin; calling for Palin to be gang raped by black men and assorted other horrible tweets.
Banks was not muted, nor was she kicked off Twitter.
However, Twitter (thanks to the feminist "safety council" in which Lindy is a part of) has been responsible for shadow banning many prominent conservatives who have never said anything as hateful nor violent as Banks.
Chuck C Johnson, Robert Stacy McCain, Milo Y, etc.
The thought of "silencing" any speech no doubt has Ray Bradbury and George Orwell turning in their graves. The party of "progression" is now regressing to the era of book banning.
And if Lindy truly cared about bullying and shaming, well then, she'd stand for ALL women and not just select women.
By the end of the book, I found myself feeling sorry for Lindy. She is confused and being exploited by a group of people who seek power and gain by promoting victimization, by dividing us, and distracting us.
The book is hypocritical, lacks integrity and authenticity. It's hard to believe she is a champion for women when she only comes to the defense of a certain few.
Freedom of speech is the most powerful weapon we, as a society have. Those that control speech control power. The more a society is secure, the more those who want to rule need to divide, decay, district, in order to ‘save.’ And the first thing they target is speech and status. Those that advocate collective rule are distrustful that man is capable of making his own choices.

Monday, May 2, 2016

Review Of Andrea Tantaros Book "Tied Up In Knots"

Buy on Amazon 
I was very excited to get this book (I actually got the audible version). I was so excited, I wrote to the publishing company last month to ask about getting an advanced copy (they never responded).
I'm very torn as to how many stars to leave. Some parts I really liked, some parts, not so much.
I loved Dana Perino's book.
I hated Gretchen Carlson's.
I love that Andrea is a strong woman and does not follow the straight line of the party.
What I didn't like about the book:
The only thing I learned about was Tinder. I've heard about it, though had no idea it was so...caveman brain. Horrible!
Andrea throws a-lot of shade at women she has worked with. However, she doesn't name them (except for Mika Brez.). Listen, I firmly believe that if someone has done you wrong, you should absolutely call them out. It will make people think twice about the way they treat people. If we hold our tongues, remain silent, there is little chance the person has reasons to change.
I was disappointed she didn't name the people she had problems with. I understand why,'s the rub: Andrea touts being tough, strong,and opinionated, but then doesn't name names.
I wish she had told us more about her journey in life. I would have loved to hear more of her life growing up/college/etc.
She refers to the Bible at times. And yet, she's very honest in that she, like many women, have sex outside marriage.
Here is my problem: This book is all about honoring tradition and, as women, respecting ourselves. I don't think Andrea realizes quite yet that she is saying one thing, but doing another. She is trying to straddle both worlds, and this is what causes conflict in our personal life.
She really doesn't say anything new or life changing.
There are very few details in the book that I didn't already know about her.
The Pros:
I loved the bits about her mother and father. Here is where the book really felt authentic, honest, emotional. I just wish there had been much more about them.
I loved the truth she spoke about Mika!
It was interesting that she gave us a bit of a look into her love life. WHO IS UNCLE RICO???
I'm glad she addressed Porn and Tinder. I doubt there are any Conservatives that would (except Gutfeld).
After having listened to the book, I feel I actually like her less. Her horrible temper-tantrums with earlier boyfriends. Her insistence that one of her boyfriends marries her (and then when he didn't want to, she broke up and decided that maybe getting married is NOT for her after all). The audible version has her coming off as somewhat materialistic and a bit demanding. There are authors I've read that make me feel I would gladly love to have a beer with them. Andrea isn't one of those people: I'd worry she'd be quietly judging me the whole time.
I still admire her work ethic and that she seems to not simply follow party lines; I LOVE that.
Would I recommend it?
That's difficult. I'd say borrow it if you can. If you don't have the money to spend, don't. But if you do, go for it.
It won't keep you up at night - and there really is little here that is a revelation.
And perhaps the book version is better than the audio. In the audio, she reads it herself, and though she does a good job, at times when she's repeating conversations, it's hard to know who is who.
I think I would have given this 3 stars, but I'm going to give 4 because I know there will be many "tolerant" liberals who haven't even read the book leaving 1 stars. So to help her with the haters, I'm bumping it up to 4.

Sunday, May 1, 2016

I Am (NOT) Dying. Yet!

I am not dying! YAY!
After an MRI revealved that the pain in my knee that would not heal was a meniscus tear, the ortho (Dr. Ben Chu, Rothman Institute, love him and recommend him!) said it would never heal. I could have surgery now or later.
I decided "now" was better.
And then had serious anxiety.
Not, privileged white girl anxiety or anxiety as disease of the year (give me Xanax (or whatever)), but irrational fear of surgery.
I rescheduled the first surgery.
And oddly enough, a week later, I was no longer walking with a limp. I didn't need my knee brace. I couldn't run without pain, but...hey - the only thing I run for these days is...nothing.

I wish someone had told me that this pain could go away; it would just take time. As in months. But it MIGHT slowly get better. And perhaps the doc had told me this on the first visit, but after I heard the word surgery, I zoned out a bit.

I met with Dr. Chu again, proudly walked around the exam room, and he was impressed. Actually, I have no idea if he was impressed or not, though the nurse did tell me she was impressed with my Skechers.

Dr. Chu said it is possible for the inflammation to subside to the point of feeling almost healed. However, how long it will last? Because like an adult tooth that has fallen out, the meniscus will never heal.

So for now, I've cancelled the surgery. And now I totally regret the lack of willpower I had when it came to food (who counts calories when they think they only have weeks to live? Not me!). The extra weight sure doesn't help things with my knee either.

So, I'm not dying because of a planned surgery anytime soon.

I could, however, be dying from Lyme disease. I've picked out 3 ticks from dog Jack, and several in the bedroom over the past month.

And Lyme disease has progressed to the number one disease fear - thus relinquishing anxiety to the number two spot. And if anyone knows anything about me, I like to be number one!

5/1/16 - Original Post
I am certain that I’m going to die soon.
I have to have surgery to remove my meniscus.
Now, listen, to any other person, surgery like this is not a big deal.
But I am not like any other person.
I am overly dramatic.
I also have a cardiac history which I was assured was “nothing” only to discover upon waking up after surgery to have my breasts enlarged (by far the most ridiculous thing I’ve done) that I went into bigeminy and trigemniy while under anesthesia. I also have a tendency to turn anemic, and I have low blood pressure.
So now, anytime I have to have anesthesia, I freak out.  I still have my wisdom teeth and was advised to have them removed. But they aren’t causing problems, so I don’t want to take the chance of going under.
I was supposed to have a colonoscopy. Nope. It’s not going to happen. I’m never going to do it. Not unless I’m in so much pain that the fear of being in constant pain lessens the fear of dying on the table. Case in point: I had a complete hysterectomy. I took the chance of dying on the table rather than living with the debilitating symptoms.
Now, the interesting thing is: prior to my hysterectomy, I was sick for almost a year.  My blood work correlated to the fact that something was causing my extreme fatigue. I couldn’t take a shower without getting out of breath. Could barely walk the dogs without wheezing. After testing, bumping up my iron, things improved. But in the meantime, the tests had revealed a lesion on my liver, a large diverticulum on my duodenum (I still really do not understand what that means but my GI guy said stop worrying about it, so finally, I did), and a cyst on my ovary that never went away and others that had bled and left scars.
I really became convinced I was dying. And with that in mind, I started to question my life choices. I’d read a series of books that had provided many brilliant insights to how my life might have been more…successful. Might have saved me from a whole hell of a lot of embarrassing choices and mistakes that had been chronic. Would have made me a better parent. A better person.
So I threw a book together as fast as I could and called it “Something that Will Change Your Life.” I took a pen name: Moxie Will (because listen, if people can self-identify as different RACES, surely, I can choose a different name).
I’ve always loved the name Moxie, and believed it fit my personality: quirky, colorful, strives to be courageous. And Will: because I truly believe self-determination is the key to happiness. We makes the human race unique is that we are born with the ability to control our own thoughts, our own attitude. But we’ve been conditioned to believe that we are not capable of making our own good choices. That we are damaged and hardwired to fail; we aren’t really responsible for our actions –we’ll be doomed no matter what we choose, so why not choose pleasure as often as possible!
But as I honestly reviewed my life and my choices, I realized my thoughts had been highly influenced by society: Madonna’s “Like A Virgin” video was released when I was 16 years old. And the articles I read in Teen magazines had less to do with respecting your body by NOT having sex and focused more on “the right of young women to choose to HAVE sex.”
But mostly, it was the books I’d read and movies I’d watched: everything had to do with love. Love was the thing that made the world go around. Finding a person to love you was finding someone who would provide you with a soft landing when the sea of life got too rough.
My parents had been a product of their upbringing and the generation that always sided with adults and placed little value on their kids feelings.
Being the curious and outspoken kid I was growing up; I was often in trouble for question authority (I know, can you believe it?). My parents almost always sided with the ‘grownups.’ – so I was eager to find someone to stick up for me, fight for me – someone like the love interest in almost all the books I read and the movies and TV shows I watched.
Obviously, I didn’t die. I ended up having a hysterectomy and came through with flying colors.
Only now that I was better, the immediacy of getting the lessons I’d learned (so that hopefully, others might make less mistakes and have more satisfaction and happiness in their lives) was not so immediate.
And then my fear of looking stupider than I usually do – which could possibly cause my husband to divorce me (which, would then take away my medical insurance!) – which could alienate my children (who are already embarrassed by ¾ of what I do and say), fear and self-preservation wormed it’s way into mindset.
Also, I was no longer the fun girl. I cared more about striving to be good; to be better, than to be out drinking, partying, shopping, being entertained. To me, learning WAS fun. (Oh my god, maybe I have brain cancer). I focused on history and little known books from the 1950’s and 60’s.
I had all these IDEAS. I have binders full of notes. Full of highlights. Full of writing. Yet, I was too afraid to put anything out there.
I don’t really fit anywhere.
I’m not religious, though I very much respect and admire those who practice.
I’m spiritual in a naturey sort of way.
I’m more Conservative in my values. I believe in tradition. Yet, I’m still, under it all, a rebel who questions the status quo. I’m a huge believer in personal freedom. It shouldn’t be about anyone controlling anyone – it should be about teaching people the value of character and courage and common sense, so that when they are faced with temptations of temporary escape and excessive pleasure; they are aware of the long term consequences to their spirit, their character, and ultimately, their happiness.
When I didn’t die from a mystery disease, when I didn’t die from surgery, a part of my rebel spirit did die.
When I had convinced myself I might be , probably was, dying,  I felt free to be myself – to continue to rebel!
When I woke up after surgery (and it takes a-while to heal from a hysterectomy) I was very aware of my mortality.
When I was young and a rebel; it didn’t worry me too much; I still had plenty of time to find a partner and/or become so successful I wouldn’t have to worry about where I’d live and how I’d survive.
Then I started to notice the crows feet, my body started complaining, and I had not become wildly successful.
I did/do have a partner, however. He was/is getting a bit tired of my creativity AND his buying the groceries. I had my own money, but it was not very much. Okay, it’s actually so little that I have stopped even going to consignment shops, coloring my hair, and avoid any celebration that requires giving gifts (which, let’s be honest, the whole gift thing is WAY OUT OF HAND, even people who can easily afford giving gifts agree with me).  He has been hoping his support will pay off. I think he’s starting to have more hope in winning the lottery.
The bad news is: I need to have surgery.
The good news is: I again, believe I’m going to die during the operation; it gives me an excuse to worry less about making a fool out of myself, and concentrate more on helping people realize what the difference is between a significant life and a superior life, and what long held beliefs and influences are holding them back from true happiness.
The bad news is: I have no plan of implementation. I am not totally focused. I absolutely know I’m going to embarrass myself (that’s good entertainment for you though, right!).
And if I DO die, well hell, hopefully my message will reach many more people much faster and I’ll save the world after all! Or at least the part that isn’t 100% committed to the Kardashians.

So stay tuned. Though I don't have a concrete plan, I DO intend to blog every day until the surgery. To share things I've experienced. I plan on writing about Tinder. Sex. (Okay, I guess they are the same thing). All the Liberal Things I've Done. Hypocrite City. How Forgiveness is Mostly Bullshit. Why we should stop celebrating everything. And much more...

And if I don’t die; then at least I will be farther than I would have been by keeping everything bottled up until I was able to formulate the “perfect” plan. I will know that, once again, I’m facing life in my quirky, somewhat courageous way, and if my husband divorces me, at least I’ll have two good knees to continue dancing through life. In consignment store (but fabulous!) shoes, of course.

Something Wishful This Way Comes...

 Something Wishful This Way Comes...

Would you live your life differently if you knew that one day your deepest desire would be fulfilled?

Hollywood A-List actress Moxie Bleu is wildly successful but lonely. On the eve of her latest movie premiere, Moxie discovers she's been drugged and deceived. When a wizened old woman stops to help, Moxie finds herself confessing she feels like a fraud, undeserving of her fortune and fame. The woman offers a solution to Moxie’s unhappiness and with one wish, everything changes.

1958 homemaker Sadie Cooper is the envy of every woman in the cozy town of Honey Hollow, Pennsylvania. Married to charming Jack Cooper, the mother of two darling daughters, Sadie is well loved by family and friends. Lately, though, Sadie finds she is distracted and a bit resentful that she gave up a career in theater to get married and raise a family. One evening in July, Sadie’s sister, Kitty, talks her into visiting the old antique shop: May Contain Magic. The shop is rumored to be run by a family of sisters that have ties to Salem. Sadie soon discovers the meaning behind the name of the shop: May Contain Magic.

The next morning, Sadie and Moxie wake to find they have switched lives.
Sadie must navigate through the technological advances of the 21st century and Moxie's professional career –which is in shambles.
And Moxie finds it difficult to live in a world not constantly connected by the internet or cell phone - and that being an actress is a piece of cake compared to being a mother and wife.

Diary of Movie Star Moxie Bleu is a story about wishes coming true, the magic of friendship and family, filled with humor and includes a recipe for cookies that will surely bring a little bit of magic into every readers' life.

Available on BN.COM for Nook 2.99

Available on Amazon Kindle 2.99