Monday, January 31, 2011
As of this writing, I've only lost 1 pound. But seeing as the last 2 weeks I didn't follow any plan - I'll take it:>)
I'm @ 134 pounds.
Belly Fat Cure - Probably good for people who need to lose over 20 pounds or more or who eat a-lot of processed food. For me? No so good. Maybe good if you're incredibly overweight, but according to BMI, I'm not. I already eat relatively healthy, so I didn't see any huge changes worth noting.While I enjoyed the ease of the book/plan - the PRO's: it made me aware of how much SUGAR exists in food. I photocopied the chart in the book. Instead of counting calories, you simply keep track by checking off the circles (allowed 15 grams of sugar, 6 grams of carbs). Very easy to do. Con - the promise of losing 8 pounds in 7 days did not work for me. You are told NOT to keep track of calories and this to me, seems counterproductive. Cheese has 532 calories in a cup of cheddar cheese. No sugar. 2 grams of carbs. Um, if you don't count calories, you might think, "Hey, no sugar and little carbs - I could eat 4 more cups of cheese!" But this would put you at over 2,000 calories! Doesn't seem wise to me. I'd give it a D.
Tim Ferris The 4 Hour Body Slow Carb - While I only did this for a week, found it easy to follow, had lots of energy, lost 2 pounds, and this might be something I want to consider following (or at least trying for a full month). I'd give it an A!
Todd Durkin - Impact Body Plan -The Impact Body Plan (for fitness) - didn't stick with it after the second week. I'd list the excuses but that's all they are. So will restart Feb 1st. However, the first 2 weeks I did enjoy, but because I didn't really stick with it, I can't comment over all.
Feb 1st (actually starting Jan 31 since it's a Monday) I've read Veganist by Kathy Freston and am going Vegan for the next 29 days. I'm still going to try to keep my sugar intake low. After reading Veganist, I don't know that I'll ever be able to eat an egg again. SIGH. My friends said, "How are you going to live without bacon? Butter? Chocolate?" Well, it IS only 29 days. I'm excited to test how I'll feel as much as how it will affect my weight. There is also the animal thing.
I've thought about going on a cooking contest reality show many times, but I have to admit, when it comes to preparing raw meat, I freak out a little (except for bacon, it doesn't bother me). I have no problem eating meat if I don't have to prepare it (unless I think about the excerpt I read in Skinny Bitch about the worker at meat packing plant who abused animals horribly and about the many horrible things that happen to those animals). If I had to debone an chicken or gut a fish, I'd never be able to do it. If I was on Survivor and got to know a 'chicken' and then we had to kill it for food - I KNOW I wouldn't be able to eat it. I hate that I'm weak like that, and people tell me that in a time of extreme hunger, I 'd eat anything, but I don't know that I would.
In my perfect world, I'd have a garden and grow as many vegetables as I could. I'd have a cow for milk products and chicken for eggs (uh, if I ever get over what I read about them in the book, which I probably will). I don't think I could eat a pig or cow that I'd gotten to know. I mean, maybe, I could eventually rationalize it.
It's so easy to eat if you don't *think* about where that slice of bacon came from (it's much easier for me to eat if I know it was raised on a kind farm).
I'm really excited to start on this 29 day Veganist journey. And thank God wine is made from grapes!
Saturday, January 29, 2011
I recently bought All I Wanted - The Movie and this clip of Mikel basically saying - Man, all I hope is that we aren't assholes and sometimes, man, I feel like an imposter - and if this all ends - it will be okay, I'll go back to writing.
I love his vulnerability (who doesn't sometimes feel like an imposter? I still don't feel like an adult) and I love that he says, Man, it will be OK, if this ends. That's kind of the secret of life, I think - knowing whatever happens, you'll pick yourself up and begin again.
Now, this is a great read. It originally appeared in Men's Health. It. Fucking. Rocks.
Brad Pitt Whipped Me Into Shape
By Mikel Jollett
I was a big fat slob. Then I went to the movies.
You can find the motivation to get in shape in the oddest places.
Some guys find it in a doctor's office after a sobering chest exam or blood test or biopsy. Others find it at a high-school reunion when That Girl from 10th-grade biology doesnt recognize them through the haze of cheap vodka, male-pattern baldness, and so many forgotten years. As any good Russian novelist could tell you, life reaches a crossroads - and big changes follow - when sex seems less likely than death.
I found my motivation in the back of a movie theatre in Santa Monica, California. That's where Brad Pitt comes in, but more about him later.
I was 25 years old, working a hundred hours a week in an office. I hadn't really set out for that life, but you know how those things go. You'd trade a kidney for an extra zero at the end of your paycheck, and so on. My days were filled with 5-year plans, capital-amortization reports, key-performance indices - i.e., the tortured lexicon of the modern office. For the first time in my life, there wasn't much time for exercise. Hell, there wasn't much time for anything but sleep and work. And eating.
Why do so many office events involve food? The candy jar on the secretary's desk. Doughnuts at morning budget meetings. Rubbery chicken lunches at the Yale Club. Steak dinners with board members. It's like we're trying to feed some existential hunger, trying to fill a dark void at the center of office life with caramels, Hershey's Kisses, and muffin baskets. People eat at the office for the same reason they drink at a bar: to forget they're there.
I don't know exactly when it got away from me. In college, on the track team, I had been all-Pac 10 in the 10,000 meters, a svelte 148 pounds whipping around the oval at 70 seconds per quarter mile. At that age, those of us on the cross-country team, those of us who ran 12 to 15 miles a day and ate mountains of food at night, felt like wild beasts. Like we were born to leap boulders, like we were panting, pawing, screaming to run. It's probably mixed up with some milk-toothed adolescent fantasy, but we really felt like we were pushing the limits of mortality. All that pain and strain and exhaustion and exhiliration. How far can we go? How fast can we run? How much can we take? Let's find out.
But by age 25, after 3 years in office purgatory, 3 years of meetings and dinners and lunches and drinks, I was up to 225 pounds. Sitting there, listening to these middle-aged men make jokes about their wives over two-martini lunches, I felt caged, fenced in, trapped, old, tired, fat, bored.
I would find myself walking the flourescent-lit corridors of that ungodly building with reams of green-and-white printout paper covered with endless rows of numbers, a big, round gut hanging over the 38-inch waistline of my green slacks, seething about the budget. "Have you seen these numbers, people?" Every now and then I'd catch a glimpse of my reflection in the office glass and wonder who the fat man was.
Then it happened. In that movie theater in Santa Monica. Fight Club. I know that sounds trite. I know it should have been the birth of my first child or something. But it was Fight Club that did it. I remember seeing Marla Singer (played by Helena Bonham Carter), with that ragged eyeliner and waifish body. She was so trashy and dirty and hot and broke. And Tyler Durden (Brad Pitt) lived in this abandoned house in the middle of nowhere with the anonymous narrator (Ed Norton). All they ever did was get in fights, wreak havoc, work out, and make fun of the automatons. Though it all ended miserably - but triumphantly! - with that Pixies song when those buildings blew up, God, my life just seemed so tame by comparison, so forgettable, so compliant. I thought, What the hell am I doing? I'm 25 years old.
I saw the movie four times in one week. And I cracked. I quit my job. I dumped my girlfriend. I started working out constantly. Running, swimming, lifting weights, drinking protein shakes, eating apples.
My routine was basic. I thought of it as a matter of simple physics: If I burn more than I consume, my body will metabolize fat. It has to. I figured that at my weight, with my metabolism, I burned about 2,500 calories a day. So I kept to a 2,000 calorie diet and worked out like mad. Four runs a week (100 calories per mile), three swims (100 calories per 15 minutes), four weight sessions (300 calories per hour, plus beach muscles). I made sure I never rang up more than a 7,000 calorie deficit (which equals 2 pounds of fat) in a given week, since your body freaks out when you do that.
It was tedious at first. The runs were painful, I was always sore, and it took so much damn time. I had to make a decision: The plan would come first - it was the only obligation I absolutely had to fulfill. Everything else in my life would have to fit in around it.
After about a month, after the initial shock had worn off, once my feet had calloused over and my hair had become ragged from the chlorine, the plan became something else. A dare. Not in the okay-tough-guy, No Fear, come-over-here-and-check-out-my-glutes kind of way. More like it was a daring thing to do.
Because if you think about it, it's kind of absurd. Grown adults running through fields, unprompted, unchased, lifting heavy objects for no practical purpose, swimming back and forth repeatedly across a rectangle of water and heavy chemicals. It prompts a question in your mind, while you're persuing these senseless tasks: What sort of creature does this kind of thing, anyway?
Over time, the answer becomes obvious, even if it's just something you feel in your bones: Because this is what I was born to do. This is what this body was made for.
As for the desk job, those hellishly vapid budget reports: Was I honestly made for that crap?
When the money that I'd saved ran out, I started working as a carpenter, walking around with a tool belt on all day, driving a 5-ton truck, familiarizing myself with the layout of Home Depot. It was good to be paid to sweat. The guys I worked with couldn't quite understand why I was doing basic construction instead of the cushy office job I'd left. "Hey, Stanford U," they'd say to me, "think you could nail this two-by-four in that frame over there? They teach you how to do that in school?"
The work itself had its benefits. At the end of the day, when my back hurt and my hands ached from pounding a hammer or wielding a screw gun for 8 hours, I felt as though I'd earned a drink. And anyway, there is a certain manful pride in knowing your way around a miter saw and a speed square. But it was mostly monotonous and nothing I had aspired to. I wasn't in it for that.
I was in it for the sense of possibility. For the idea that you can shake your life up like a soda bottle and smask it against the wall. That whatever prisons we construct in our lives - whether it's an awful job, a gut, an unhappy marriage, an addiction, the things in life that hem us in, that make us wake up in the morning in a cold sweat and think, How did I get like this? and How can I escape? - all these things are transient. For me, and maybe for anyone, the answer was, just leave. Tear the entire thing down.
In 6 months, I was down 55 pounds - to 170 - and had all the accoutrements that so famously go with exercise: more energy, more confidence, better sleep, less stress. In place of the gut, I had the six-pack I'd had in college. I was also broke and single and had squandered what I had once understood to be a promising future. I didn't care.
I met a girl in Las Vegas. We exchanged phone numbers, and when I got back to Los Angeles, I called her. She invited me over to her place, a real dump in Culver City that was brimming with empty wine bottles and Liz Phair posters. When I walked in, she was sitting on the couch - skinny, big eyes, flat chested, her shirt half unbuttoned, dirty blonde hair, and lots of eyeliner. My own private Marla Singer. I nearly cried.
"Have you seen this movie?" she asked, pointing to the television. And I couldn't even make this up: It was Fight Club - the scene where Ed Norton fakes a fight with his boss to get fired. In the process he destroys the office, cutting his hands and back and face on the shattered galss of a coffee table. He walks out, whistling, pushing a pile of office equipment in a cart, with a smile on his face and blood dripping down his shirt. Fantastic.
I know, I know. Sophomoric. It is, a bit. But whatever the motivation, once I started taking exercise seriously, I felt more alive. I felt that my life had possibilities. I felt stronger. There's really nothing so basically transformative, nothing so regenerative, as getting in shape. Some of it is simple blood sugar, blood pressure, metabolism, and endorphins. Your high-school P.E. teacher could have told you that. But it's also the sense that if you can change your body, you can change anything. You feel your muscles working beneath your clothes, you become aware of your heartbeat, and you remember that you're an animal first and animals do not like to be fenced in.
The fact is, we're going to be dead someday, and I don't care how important we are or how much money we make, how refined our taste in wine, music, clothes, literature, art, women. Those things are great, but there's just no escaping that your life begins and ends in your own body, your health, your ability to talk to That Girl with confidence, smile in the face of sobering news, senselessly lift heavy objects, swim great distances across various geometric figures, test your mortality, shatter some glass, eat an apple, tear across the plains, and run down a bloody gazelle.
It may be absurd, but honestly, you have to fill the void somehow, and you're simply not going to do it with muffin baskets.
Originally appeared in Men's Health, March 2006
Friday, January 28, 2011
The link for ordering is here -
There are many different colors, of course, you know I'll be ordering PINK, and you get a 100 strands for 10 bucks. And you get free shipping (if you're in the USA)!
Of course, the message of WHY she was on Oprah was not lost on me - here was a woman who shook herself off, took like by the lapels, freed herself to be herself, and now is taking the world one sparkle at a time.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
I shot this video in the summer. With a wind-chill of 9 degrees, I'm a bit nostalgic for the sun, flip flops, and tank tops. Also, watermelon, plums, Heirloom tomatoes, and sweettttttttt corn on the cob. Sigh.
Anyway - here's the easiest Drunken Dreamsicle Cocktail Recipe Going.
Orange Gatorade + as much Pinnacle Whipped Vodka as you like!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
|Deep Fried Twinkie Wrapped in Bacon|
In 2011 I want to lose 30 pounds but I'm overwhelmed by all the popular diet/exercise programs plans that were featured on talk shows and that lined bookstore shelves.
So I decided to try them all!
Each month in 2011, I'll try a popular diet combined with a popular workout plan –
January: The Belly Fat Diet by Jorge Cruise and The Impact Body Plan by Todd Durkin.
February: Veganist Diet by Kathy Freston and /YOGA
March – THE DUKAN DIET by Dr. Dukan/PHYSIQUE 57 DVD
APRIL – The 17 Day Diet by Mike Moreno / P90X DVD’s
MAY – The Four Hour Body by Timothy Ferriss/Kettle Bells
JUNE – Paleo/Primal/”Caveman Diet” / Local Gym
JULY- FATHEAD THE MOVIE by Tom Naughton / Biggest Loser Kinect DVD
AUGUST- SPARK DIET by Chris Downie/INSANITY DVD
SEPTEMBER – Gluten Free/ The Total Gym
OCTOBER – The Dukan Diet/Walking
NOVEMBER – ????
Friday, January 7, 2011
|Sage Fried Chicken with Bacon Waffles. Not on The Belly Fat Cure Diet.|
But at the end of week, when my jeans still fit the same and the scale didn't budge, I said, Fuck This! I spent half of my Friday afternoon searching for new "diets" to try and when I found the Dukan Diet which is all the rage in the UK (and coming soon to a US bookstore near you!), I thought...YES! THIS IS IT! All you have to do is eat lean protein. Lots of it. No sugar. No carbs. You can lose up to 10 pounds in 5 days! Wow! You had me at rapid weight loss!
And then I did the little test (you give your email info and they give you a lifetime supply of email reminders about how they can help you) - I put in my numbers and it would tell me what my TRUE weight should be and...drummm rollllllllllllllllll....it said, "Congratulations - you are at your true weight."
Because, you see, while I might fit some sort of ideal chart, I know that ideally, I felt happiest and most energetic when I was running around in my cute size 4 jeans 1 summer ago. So, NO, I am not at my true weight.
But. Then. It hit me. The reason these 'fad' diets aren't working is because I don't have a ton of weight to lose. Yeah, you can probably lose 5-10 pounds in one week on the Belly Fat Cure or the Dukan Diet, but that's if you're carrying alot of extra yellow fat cells.
So. I'm done with it all. The only thing I'm really curious about is how I'll feel if I cut grains out. So I'm going to try that for awhile. I'm also going to compare fitness plans - I'll be sticking with my Impact Body Plan and reporting on that.
The awesome feature of the Belly Fat Cure was that I learned how much sugar is actually in foods. It felt awesome cutting down on carbs and sugar - my energy level was phenomenal. I'd still recommend to people looking to take control of their weight. Easy to follow. Leaves you full of energy. But if you only have a little weight to lose, you'll be disappointed you did lose it all in the first week. Unless you're level head and realistic.
I am not.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
The thing I like about the Belly Fat Cure diet is that fat is okay in moderation. Not typically a broccoli fan but a little mayo/a little bacon grease (only about a tsp!) realllllllllllllly flavored the crunchy greens. I added tomatoes to make it more healthy and it was to die for!
Day 6. The biggest change is way more energy and in 6 days I've never felt bloated or weighed down after eating. Tomorrow I'll step back on the scale.
Breakfast - ham/cheese omlette
Lunch- Broccoli Bacon Salad
Dinner- home made tomato soup. Snack 2 mini muffins. Night cap: small vodka & Diet Coke
The winning numbers in Tuesday's $355 million Mega Millions were: 4, 8, 15, 25, 47 and the Mega Ball 42.
On "LOST" - one of the characters, Hurley Reyes, won one of the biggest lottery jackpots in U.S. history by playing the numbers 4, 8, 15, 16, 23 and 42.
And brings to question...did the numbers come up because SO many people (ie: Lost Fans) played them?
In the $355 million drawing on January 4, 2011, there were nearly 26,000 players who matched 3 numbers and the Mega Ball. I have no idea how many of those people played the Lost numbers, but if I was a betting free drinks for the night that most of those 26,000 were lost fans, no doubt, I'd be bathing in Dirty Martinis!
Remember on 9/11 2002 - the daily winning lottery number in NYC was 911 .
Uh, hello! John says, it was just coincidence.
Seriously? WTF people! I believe that what is occurring in these situations is that a ton of people pick the same numbers and somehow, because so many people are thinking those numbers.
I'd love to see Malcom Gladwell do a book about coincidences and the power of thought. Someone should call him.
Although, now, here's a little something to make your head spin:
A similar coincidence occurred Nov. 12 when the nightly number draw 5-8-7 came up in the New Jersey Lottery the day American Airlines Flight 587 crashed on the New York coast. Almost 30,000 people picked that number that day (the Flight crashed in the morning).
How can this NOT BLOW ANYONE'S MIND? People saying it's just chance? No freaking way. Coincidence? More.
Whatever it is, it leaves me Wonderstruck!
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
|Oscar Grouch cupcake from Wegmans. Fit my mood!|
I set out to find out just how many carbs/calories/sugar grams were in my BBCChip mini muffins and discovered 2 great sites that can help you do just that.
Spark People's Recipe Calculator AND the Fat Secret Calculator. You can use Fat Secret to look up common nutritional values (say a 1/2 cup of canola oil) and then input that into the Spark People recipe calculator along with the other ingredients and servings and magically - there is a break down of your how many calories/carbs/sugar grams are in one serving of your fabulous muffins/cookies/cakes.
Today I was wondering - GEEZ- is all this WORTH it! And when we went to Wegmans and all I had was the salad from the salad bar (which is FABULOUS) all the while freaking dying from the yeasty sweet smell of bread baking drove me bonkers, I was like, IS THIS WORTH IT.
But yes, it's worth it. It's all a learning process. I'm curious and it's kinda cool to figure out things on my own - what might be in my body's best interest. I'm becoming way more aware and finding alternatives (fresh lime juice freaking ROCKS on chicken/tortilla meals).
On the way home from Wegmans and now, a few hours later, I have a ton of energy. Had I had the fried chicken from the hot bar or a steaming hot roll slathered in butter, no doubt I'd feel sluggish. So, there are trade offs. And geez, we're only talking a few days after the holidays. It's not like I've been living on Survivor Island for 32 days!
Breakfast - 2 mini BBCChip muffins (I'm not proud of this, but WTH)
Lunch/Dinner - Salad of Spinach/bacon/fresh Parmesan cheese/cuccumbers and this awesome broccoli bacon salad.
Dessert - a nice night cap of Vodka and Diet Cranberry Gingerale:>)
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Breakfast was one egg and a slice of whole grain bread. Lunch was 1/2 cup of refried beans w/ hot sauce, 2 small corn tortillas and 1 tablespoon of sour cream.
Dinner was chopped tomato/spinach/bacon and mayo.
Walked Diablo for an hour.
Made Bacon Banana Chocolate Chip mini muffins. I'd only used 4 of the 6 grams of carbs and 1 gram of sugar prior till then. Then I had oh...4 mini muffins. Maybe five. Sigh. They were de-lish.
I did sub 3/4 of the sugar with apple butter (only sugar in that was natural). So....But hey. I didn't go totally crazy! I could have. Easily.
And so ends my day 4!
Monday, January 3, 2011
I think I may have found a new calling.
Way more excited about this than the fitness experiment.
God Bless Bourbon and Bacon.
Laura "1 Quirky Girl" Freed
Food ate today: 2 small corn tortillas with 1 scrambled egg and orange pepper. 2 Homemade Oatmeal Cookie bites (surprisingly better the second day!) Spinach salad w/ chicken and orange pepper. I'll edit this tomorrow if I eat anything later by I try not to eat after 7. However. The Bachelor is on tonight and though I said I was DONE with it, I seriously think Brad was the most down to earth real Bachelor - so I might have some pepper strips and hummmmmmmmmmmmus.
I'm feeling great! And no cravings today. Except for wine - which I'm allowed to have. CHEERS!!!
Sunday, January 2, 2011
I did really well today and have to say the plan is sooo freaking easy.
One thing that is surprising is how much sugar seems to be in almost EVERYTHING.
Jorge Cruise doesn't recommend eating grapefruit but...I gladly gave up MOST of my sugar grams today for 1/2 of a pink grapefruit (10 grams of sugar in that little gem).
To the left is the Carb/Sugar tracker that I photocopied from the Belly Fat Cure book. I write down what I actually eat on the back of the paper (I learned from my Birthday Fitness Blitz that journaling really does make a huge difference). I ended yesterday with alot of sugar grams left (hey, I wonder if I can use the leftovers up all at one time?LOL) and only 1 carb left yesterday and today.
Diablo also took me for a 35 minute walk (in the rain). Tomorrow it's back to Snap fitness and will be incorporating the Impact Fitness plan by Todd Durkin.
All in all, feeling fine!
Saturday, January 1, 2011
OMG. Info overload.
But. I was intrigued as I roamed the Health/Fitness Aisle of Barnes and Noble. Everyone seemed to have the answer. Everyone seemed to be sure of the "cure" - the one thing we all need to feel indestructible and more importantly, nothing tastes as good as THIN feels (uh, not to offend, but I do believe nothing tastes as good as thin feels - with the exception of bacon, martini's, home made bread slathered generously with butter, and Red Velvet Cake).
Every month I'll try out a different diet plan and different workout routine.
I discovered during my birthday fitness blitz that keeping a daily log really kept me honest and made me stick to the plan.
So, if this helps other people decide what might work for them, great. If not, it will still be helpful for ME to keep track of my progress.
Basically, I'm just curious. Are all these "diets" just marketing schemes designed to make the author rich...or is there truly something worthwhile?
And this month, January 2011, I'll be testing Jorge Cruise's Belly Fat!
Mostly because I can drink wine on this plan.
Other than that, it seems very user friendly and sooo easy. Basically it comes down to this: 15 grams of sugar and 6 grams of carbs per day. The carb scale works out to be: 5-20 carbs per serving = 1 carb. 21-40 = 2 carb servings. 42-60 carbs = 3 servings.
Sugar grams are whatever is stated on the food. Example: the corn tortillas I ate today had 2 grams of sugar per serving - I had 2 tortillas - which equal 4 grams of sugar. According to Jorge, you can lose weight w/o exercising , but actually, I like the rush of endorphins I get after hitting the treadmill or weights, so I'm also going to be testing a workout plan, and for the next 10 weeks, it will be IMPACT mostly because I read about it in the Men's Health magazine I stole from Snap Fitness in Lansdale and it seemed doable.
Every night, I will log what I ate, exercise attempted, haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, and how I feel. At the end of the month I'll wrap it up with positives/negatives and the end result.
And so today - 1/1/11 -
Lunch/Breakfast (because I slept in...it's New Years Day, Bitches!) - 2 corn tortillas with rotisserie chicken, guacamole and spinach. 3 carbs 3 grams of sugar. Dinner 2 Scrambled eggs/orange peppers/ no carbs/no sugar. Dessert :>))) 2 glasses of White Wine (Hey, I didn't drink on New Years Eve!!!) - 2 carbs 2 grams of sugar.
Exercise - 70 minutes of dog walking (IMPACT begins on Monday 1/3).
Staring weight 134. Yes. I gained back almost (almost!!!) all of the weight I lost after my birthday fitness blitz!
Here's to a great New Year! And Bacon!